What do mini-figures eat? Ha, like we'll ever get around to that here...


Pharaoh Hotep: Hypaxxus, Portal Emperor, Overlord, Dr. Inferno, Mallock the Malign, welcome. I'm glad you could all make it to our meeting of the great council of villainous villains. Unfortunately, Ogel is locked in jail, Queen Hippopotamus of the Mars Mission Aliens is trying to get into law school, Makuta couldn't fit in here, and Sir Fangar didn't feel like being evil anymore. We tried to get Scorm but apparently he's still frozen. So, we'll make do with who we have.

Hypaxxus: Kling-gori! Mar-tok van Amset-Ra?

TC-17: The great Hypaxxus 5 wishes to know why Amset Ra, the exalted owner of this fine 5-sided shape, is not present at this meeting?

Pharaoh Hotep: Grr... That's why we're having this meeting. I believe that Amset has not been... Evil enough to own this pyramid, or to hold a seat on the great council of villainous villains.

Dr. Inferno: He locked Ogel in the cells and kicked me out of my job... I needed that money...

Pharaoh Hotep: You think that him locking away one of our own is villainous? Villains stick together! Let us all remind ourselves of the morals of a villain by repeating the Creed of Cruelty.

All Present (Hypaxxus in his own language): I hereby swear to be humble in my ultimate victory and enslavement of the universe. I also promise to help those other villains in need, and to always allow my enemies to gain an advantage, either by me wasting time, being too confident, or not thinking of the most obvious avenue to defeat. I commit to evilness, but not if it will hurt innocent people. I also swear to be completely oblivious to easy victory. Equality, cowardice, respect, honesty and helpfulness are the morals I will always follow. Victory!

Portal Emperor begins crying.

Dr. Inferno: It is pretty touching. Reminds me of good times before those agents started killing all my innocent minions.

Overlord: They only killed me three times! Maybe four.

Pharaoh Hotep: Can we get back on topic? We need to kick out Amset.

Hypaxxus: Yuri-tak van higgopat?

TC-17: The great Hypaxxus 5 reminds you, the ever evil egyptian based villain, that it is proper etiquette to have a vote.

Pharaoh Hotep: Ah! Right! So I vote no, he shouldn't stay. No more Amset-Ra! What about the rest of you guys?

Dr. Inferno: Well, he did throw me in prison, so I say no too.

Portal Emperor: He once told me that his pyramid was better than my portal palace. So definitely no.

Overlord: His name isn't evil enough. No.

Mallock: Never shall his name be engraved on the same stone as mine. Shall he forever rest in eternal not-peace!

Pharaoh Hotep: I'll take that as a no. Not that it matters, but what's your vote Hypaxxus?

Hypaxxus: Sap.

TC-17: The honoured and respected Hypaxxus 5, undisputed ruler of seventy-two star systems, give or take, has decided to vote against the dishonoured Amset-Ra.

Pharaoh Hotep: Good. I think that means he's out. Dr., please check the rule book.

Dr. Inferno: I burnt it by accident.

Pharaoh Hotep: Oh well. Looks like he's out! I'll go tell Ogel to break the news to him. Great job, guys!

Pharaoh Hotep leaves.

Portal Emperor: I'm hungry. Who's up for some fish and chips?

Mallock: My stomach burns with the hunger of a thousand lonesome souls, all searching for their abandoned bodies, forever doomed to a life of unrest and not-peace. Bring me this feast of fishy food!

Dr. Inferno: No vinegar on mine!

Hypaxxus: Kling mingos tavanark sekche omi-topi.

Portal Emperor: That's brains with lots of vinegar, right?

TC-17: Indeed.

End Transmission.